Ok, so I love my wife. She is awesome in many many ways that I do not deserve. But she gives terrible oral sex. I mean, I have to stop her when she tries to do it. She has enthusiasm, and she really seems to want to please me, but she's really bad at it and I don't have the heart to tell her. BTW - by bad, I mean... something is just off - her grip, her rhythm... it's like a lowland gorilla trying to do the ballet. It's all jerky, violent and uncoordinated. Send help!

You’re married, you’ve sworn to be honest with her and always be up front with her so that’s what you need to do. Just tell her straight up that as of right now, she needs to work on her dick sucking skills and you would be more than happy to help her out and tell her what feels good and what doesn’t. Since you haven’t told her anything, she probably doesn’t know at this point that she isn’t doing a very good job and that can be easily fixed. Just be honest!

Tell her that you aren’t trying to hurt her feelings or make her feel bad in any way and you know that she’s trying and you know she’s actually wanting to please you, but there are some things that don’t feel good and you want to know if she would be willing to learn and do better. Ask her if she would be willing to sit down and watch porn with you, it’s actually quite amazing and makes the sex afterwards even more wild because you’re both so turned on.

But really, watch blowjob videos with her and have her practice what she’s seeing on you, tell her what things you want her to try and be sure to tell her when she’s doing a good job. You have to make it fun for her as well, so ask her what things she wants to try during foreplay and what new things she’s been wanting to try. Don’t make it all about getting her better at giving head you know? Make sure she knows she can speak up and let you know if you aren’t doing well yourself.

The key is to let her know you still love her, you still want her going down on you and nothing has changed with your feelings or desire, you just want her to improve her skills and make it more enjoyable for both of you. There is a chance her feelings will be hurt and that’s simple human reaction, it’s hard not to get discouraged when you’re told you’re not very good at something but that doesn’t mean she can’t get good at it with practice and encourgment. You two are a couple so work at this as a couple and before you know it, she’ll be sucking you off like a pro!
-April