Help! Sex for the first time! Want to be as confident as possible but also terrified due to difficult past relationships and don't know how to handle it?

The most important thing to remember is that this is a totally new relationship, with a totally different person. The struggles of your last relationship do not need to define your new one, you know? That’s an old chapter of your life that you just need to close and do your best to forget about, but always remember the lessons you were taught and all the new things you know about yourself and how you handle relationships.

It is hard to let go of the past when you’ve been through so much, but living in the past and letting old negative energy hold onto you only makes starting over that much harder. You kind of have to just move on and let it be. It is what it is. You can’t change the past but you can choose how you live now. So be as confident and sexy as you’ve always wanted to be! Don’t hold back or be something you’re not, just be you and know that being you is more than enough.

Don’t let little insecurities get into your head and keep you from enjoying yourself and actually having a good time being intimate with someone new who might end up teaching you wonderful new things and making you feel a way you’ve never felt before! Just be open and try to leave all the old stuff where it belongs, behind you.

What really helps me feel sexy is actually getting myself some pretty new lingerie that makes me feel free and sexy and confident. Something I normally wouldn’t wear but makes me feel too good to pass up. I’ll do my makeup special, actually do my hair and do whatever it takes to make me feel as sexy and confident as I know I can be. Tell yourself that you have absolutely no reason at all to be insecure and that you owe it to yourself to have a good time and not let anything negative get in the way. If it helps to have music playing or light candles, do it. Do whatever you need to feel okay coming out of your shell. You’ve got this!
-April